considered successful.considered as successful people
and some of them没有and.没有although but.选一个
until today?现在结束了?改成since
as successful people at all
because前没有逗号
drug companies
for instance后面的例子太中译英了,看不懂的,misunderstanding of customers?
furthermore前面分号后面逗号
太多长句子和复杂句子,都可以简单写,都是run-on sentence