My Happiness.
Happiness is important in our life. In fact , happiness is always around you if you put heart into it.
I will never forget that day. That day, I had a bad mark at a math test. I was afraid to meet my parents. When I got back home late, my parents knew what happened, and they said to me, “ It doesn’t matter , my child. Remember we’ll be always beside you when you need help. We believe you can be better next time. Never give up!” I was moved and made up my mind to work harder.
I feel happy. Whenever I am in trouble, I can feel my parents’ love. I want to be a good child for my parents.
这事一篇命题作文，题目为My happiness 我的幸福。文章题材为记叙文，要写一件自己发生了的幸福事，所以要用第一人称，时态用一般过去时。写作时要注意记叙文的几大要素，把故事交代清楚，句子结构要完整，注意动词的时态和主谓一致。
【亮点分析】
整篇文章结构完整，思路清晰，三段落结构很明显。文章中用了很多短语和句式，使表达更精准生动，例如：In fact, happiness is always around you if you put heart into it.事实上，只要你用心体会幸福一直在你身边。Never give up! 永不放弃。I was moved and made up my mind to work harder.我感动了并下定决心更努力学习。Whenever I am in trouble……不管我何时处在困难中，等等。